Top Five Most Embarrassing Things On Your iPod

[TheLuckyOne]

Hey guys, here's a new game for the truly courageous among you. I stole the idea from a local radio show where the hosts and producers took turns admitting the most embarrassing things on their iPods. Be honest- for all the cool alternative songs by undiscovered bands on your music player, there are at least a few things you don't want to admit to liking... stuff where if you're listening to it and someone pulls up next to you at a stoplight, you'll turn down your radio. Don't be ashamed, it's true for all of us. What this game asks you to do is to scour your music player and put the five most humiliating things out there for all to see, because if everyone's embarrassed, no one really is, right? It can either be one particular embarrassing track, several songs by an artist you're humiliated to like, a soundtrack for an embarrassing show or movie, whatever. The important thing is to have no shame, we're all in this together. Here's mine:

1) "Faded" by soulDecision. Yes, I know it's the sole hit by a Canadian boy band singing about getting drunk and trying to sex up an acquaintance. Yes, among all the genuinely seductive songs on my iPod -- Black Velvet, Criminal, Stranglehold, With or Without You -- it was voted "Least Likely To Make A Woman Want To Take Her Pants Off, Now Or Ever." Whatever, I still like it. Shut up.

2) "David Duchovny" by Bree Sharp. I know, it's a gimmick song by an unknown acoustic guitar chick about an actor on a show that started to suck badly after a few seasons. Doesn't matter. At least once a month you can still find me yelling "I'm sweet and I'm cuddly, I'M GONNA KILL SCULLY!" Now that's humiliating.

3) Assorted songs from Guys and Dolls. What can I say, they put this show on in high school, and even though I wasn't in the production (or any other), I still saw it and dug some of the songs. Ergo, I purchased the soundtrack and you can still find "Fugues For Tinhorns," "Guys and Dolls," "The Oldest Established (Permanent Floating Crap Game In New York)" and "Luck Be A Lady Tonight" on my iPod to this day. The embarrassment is mitigated sliiightly by the fact that it's members of the Rat Pack singing the songs -- Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr., the Chairman of the Board -- but still, it's Guys and Dolls. Not too manly.

4) In the same vein, several Rent songs. I know it's a popular, critically-acclaimed musical with an admirable message, but there's no getting around the fact that it's a Broadway show. What can I say, "La Vie Boheme" is damn catchy.

5) Maybe the worst of all- "Copacabana" by Barry Manilow. Eeesh. I have no excuse for this, I realize my egregious sin, but for some reason I just really like this one. C'mon, she was a showgirl who got felt up by a customer, and her lover died trying to defend her honor- that's some good soap opera crap right there. I'll hasten to add I don't like any other Barry Manilow songs, but still... the damage is done.


Honorable mentions:

-I feel no shame in having some Simpsons songs from actual episodes on my iPod -- See My Vest, Flaming Moe's, etc. -- because those are by the show's writers and tend to be quite clever. But sometime last year, I realized I had no excuse for listening to "Do The Bartman" and took it off my iPod.

-Last year's purge also saw the removal of a song or two from A Chipmunk Adventure. Granted it's a nostalgia thing, and "The Girls Of Rock N' Roll" may be catchy, but no grown man whose daughter is too young to watch TV has any business listening to it in his car.

-As a rule I despise country music with a burning passion that's hard to convey in mere words, but there are a couple of exceptions, like "The Devil Went Down To Georgia." My college swim coach used to subject us to Garth Brooks on training trips and somehow against my better nature I acquired a fondness for "Friends In Low Places." I'll probably download it soon. Now you know my secret shame.


Whew... that was cathartic. I feel better now. Who's brave enough to go next?

-D

[StarOpal]

If loving "David Duchovny" is wrong, I don't wanna be right.

I'll stand up beside you on Copacabana. Sorta, that one's a little iffy. It's mostly because the first time I heard it was when Liza Minelli was on the Muppet Show. But then I also think of the train wreck of a movie, so battling associative memories on that one.

I have no songs I am embarrassed about. Of course everyone who knows me also knows to be surprised by nothing when it comes to my music, so what should maybe be embarrassing has no context in which to be such.

With the exception of Idol Talk from the Macross Plus soundtrack. But that's because it has phone sex in the background. And pigs. Hey, it's an experimental piece!

True story: I once knew someone who had it in their will to play "Friends in Low Places" at their funeral.

[TheOogieBoogieMan]

Ugh, The Bartman...I listened to that one a few weeks ago for a nostalgic kick - a kick that landed squarely in my unmentionables.

I'm technically not embarrassed by anything I have on my iPod, but there are a few numbers on it that I wouldn't be brave enough to blast in the car. They are:

- The Phantom of the Opera soundtrack; I like musicals (and women...just saying), so having a musical's soundtrack wouldn't normally be embarrassing, except this is the soundtrack from the movie. Complete with the vocal stylings of Gerard "This is etc." Butler and Minnie "Eye is a letter" Driver.

- It's All Coming Back to Me Now; specifically, the cover by Meat Loaf, so it's not as bad as having the Celine Dion version (which I admittedly also like). Even so, it's still one of the most melodramatic pop songs sung by one of the most melodramatic pop singers, so... yeah. And on that note...

- I Don't Wanna Miss a Thing by Aerosmith; this is from an Aerosmith compilation (not, I repeat, NOT from the Armageddon soundtrack) and it sticks out like Steven Tyler's lips among the band's bloozy rockers.

- bluegrass music; specifically, the group Blue Highway. I think the band's genuinely good (and bluegrass itself is one of the more... interesting subgenres of country), but it's still not something I'd play to show off my badassery.

- Guns N' Roses' cover of Knockin' on Heaven's Door; one of the few songs on my iPod that I genuinely dislike. I keep it on for two reasons: 1) I own Use Your Illusion II and want to keep all its songs together to maintain continuity, and 2) because there's something inherently funny about Axl Rose over-singing such a simple melody ("Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, yeah!"). And the gospel choir...oh, the gospel choir...

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

I am going to admit my worst atrocity against music first and foremost so that maybe everything else won't look quite so bad:

1. Pretty much anything by Craig David could qualify, but the worst of the worst has to be "What's Your Flava?" A completely nonsensical song that compares women to flavors of ice cream was really the last thing anyone ever heard out of him, and for good reason.

2. I fell in love with one and only one Japanese song while I was in the country (mostly due to the radio stations putting even MTV to shame with their insistence upon playing almost no music ever). That one sung is sung by the Japanese male version of Cher. It's completely poppy and the lyrics make no sense. All of this was still not enough to deter me from learning every single word, singing it frequently at karaoke bars, and putting it on a CD for the Mutant Round Robin we had a couple of years ago. Let's all hear it for "Aiyori Hayaku" by Go Hiromi!

3. This one I can blame my friend for introducing me to. "Big N Chunky" by Will.i.am was used in Madagascar 2. Possibly as an extra on the DVD. I don't really know, as I haven't seen the movie. Anywho I just love the beat and his growly voice singing about how he likes his women...er...big 'n chunky.

4. "I Believe In A Thing Called Love" by The Darkness. It's The Darkness. Need I say more?

5. "Man of Constant Sorrow" by the Soggy Bottom Boys. Funny, because I detest Bluegrass music. I suppose that after living in the Bluegrass state for 21 years some of it's gonna get into your veins.


Honorable Mention:

"Three Is A Magic Number" by Blind Melon. I don't consider anything they do something embarrassing to listen to. The only reason this one gets even an honorable mention is that the song is just a catchy tune made up of singing the multiples of three over and over. I actually still sing this song in my head when I'm doing multiplication.

[StarOpal]

Okay, I found another one...

"I Think I Love You" by The Partridge Family. I have no defense.

[LadyStarblade]

Hmm...to qualify as "Most Embarrassing," one would actually have to be embarrassed by said list, and I am most certainly not. You're talking to the girl who has the soundtrack to the 'Ed Wood' musical.

But there are a few songs that are hard for me to admit to...

1. "Macarena" by Los Del Rio...I can Macarena for 15min straight. It was a dance that I could actually do when it was actually cool!

2. "Crazy" by Britney Spears. Shaddup, I can dance to it.

3. David Cook's cover of "Music of the Night" from Phantom. Okay, so he did good...actually went for the big notes rather than wuss out.

4. "Be My Girl - Sally" by the Police. Andy Summers' Shatner-style beat poetry ode to a blowup doll. This is the reason fans were smuggling blowup dolls into shows on the reunion tour...and I love Andy to death, but his singing voice is an...acquired taste.

5. I don't own the album, I don't have the single, and I despise Vanilla Ice for ripping off Queen, but I'll be damned if I don't remember every single lyric to "Ice Ice Baby."

[CheshireKat]

I'm gonna go with LadyStarblade and say that I have nothing to be ashamed of in my musical choices, though there are a few selections which might be objects of ridicule to those with less sophisticated musical palates...

1. "Playground" and "Iesha" by New Edition clones Another Bad Creation; nothing says romance like a lollypop and a letter.

2. Two CD's worth of Hannah Montana. This is mainly due to my girlfriend's (valid) complaints that there were no selections for her to enjoy amidst all the punk rock, ska, hardcore, swing, alternative and hip hop on my Ipod. I also uploaded Taylor Swift. Cuz I luvs my baby.

3. Three songs by Rick Astley; Yes, being rickrolled is inconvenient and obnoxious, but darned if his songs aren't obscenely catchy. Sing it with me: *Together forever and never to paaart; together forever witchooooo*.

4. Veggie Tales, "The Credits Song" - As songs by anthropomorphic singing and dancing vegetables who tell bible stories from the kitchen counter go, this one, played over the credits of "Jonah: A Veggietales Movie" is quite simply a masterful stroke of genius. Sample lyrics: "Wouldn't it be nice if the song under the credits, had something to do with the movie you just saw?"

5. "Ninja Rap" by Vanilla Ice, from the film "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: The Secret of the Ooze"-- Interestly enough it's safe to say that anyone who was a mutant at Christmas in '07 also has this track as it was procured from a Christmas gift CD sent from our fearless leader Justin entitled "A Cult Christmas Mix". Other selections included "Ghostbusters" by Ray Parker, "Goonies R Good Enough" by Cyndi Lauper, and "A Patrick Swayze Christmas" by the MST3K crew.

[TheLuckyOne]

Aug 10, 2009 15:04:01 GMT -5 CheshireKat said:

2. Two CD's worth of Hannah Montana. This is mainly due to my girlfriend's (valid) complaints that there were no selections for her to enjoy amidst all the punk rock, ska, hardcore, swing, alternative and hip hop on my Ipod.

...sorry, Mike, I totally did not even know you were currently dating a 12-year-old. Hey, I think that's awesome. Did you meet at a Jonas Brothers concert when you realized you both had on the same Zac Efron shirt?

-D

[StarOpal]

Aug 10, 2009 20:58:17 GMT -5 TheLuckyOne said:

...sorry, Mike, I totally did not even know you were currently dating a 12-year-old. Hey, I think that's awesome. Did you meet at a Jonas Brothers concert when you realized you both had on the same Zac Efron shirt?

-D

Wow. Dude.



(as in, that's funny, but so wrong)

[TheLuckyOne]

Aug 11, 2009 9:24:13 GMT -5 StarOpal said:

(as in, that's funny, but so wrong)

I do feel a little bad about it. But not as bad as I'd feel if Mike admitted to his girlfriend liking Hannah Montana and I stood by and did nothing.

(It's like that saying: "God has a very big heart, but there is one sin He will not forgive: if a woman calls a man to her bed and he will not go." Same principle.)

-D

[pfrsue]

I think I can beat you all for embarrassment.

I . . . have no i-pod. Nor a Zune. Nor any portable music playing device smaller than a breadbox.

I am socially doomed!

[StarOpal]

You have those things right? What are they called? Size of dinner plates, made of... vinyl? Actually I think their name may be lost to the sands of time.

What are they called, Sue?



Iloveyou,Sue,pleasedon'thurtme!IblameDrew!

[pfrsue]

Aug 14, 2009 14:00:45 GMT -5 StarOpal said:

You have those things right? What are they called? Size of dinner plates, made of... vinyl? Actually I think their name may be lost to the sands of time.

What are they called, Sue?



Iloveyou,Sue,pleasedon'thurtme!IblameDrew!

...records. I had like, a hundred of them. Singles and 33's. The Police and Men at Work and Genesis and...and...

WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[PoolMan]

I don't know what's more embarassing, that I have the songs listed below, or that I have a (dun dun DUNNN) Zune instead of an iPod. I bought the Zune because it had more features that I wanted, and for about 30% less by memory space. I stand by my decision, but it still gets me thrown out of social circles every now and then.

Anyway.

1) Everything I Do (I Do it For You) by Bryan Adams. Ack, no excuse. It came over in a rip of Waking Up the Neighbours, and I keep forgetting to get rid of it. Any time it comes up in shuffle, I skip right on by with a shudder. (this happened to "our song" when I was dating one particular girl in high school... kids, NEVER pick a song that's over 7 minutes long to have to slow dance to every time it comes on)

2) Girlfriend by Avril Lavigne. I actually stand by this one, as it's so damn catchy. Curse you, Kyle's secret lover!

3) The entire Matthew Good/Matthew Good Band catalog. Not that I expect many (or any) of you to recognize the name, as he was a Vancouver based artist that never really took off in the States. However, it's still reasonably embarassing just to me, as I was HOOKED on his music about ten years ago, when all it took to get my attention was mildly clever and depressing music to listen to while I played N64. Still good music, I just find it mildly uncomfortable having so darn much of it in my pocket all the time.

4) Some Sarah McLachlan. Now, there's some songs in there that I would defend, but there's a whole lot that I think just kind of hopped onto my player from my wife's. Yeah, that's the ticket!

5) That Norah Jones song featuring Dolly Parton. I have no excuse, really. Pity me.

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

Aug 31, 2009 13:22:36 GMT -5 PoolMan said:

I don't know what's more embarassing, that I have the songs listed below, or that I have a (dun dun DUNNN) Zune instead of an iPod. I bought the Zune because it had more features that I wanted, and for about 30% less by memory space. I stand by my decision, but it still gets me thrown out of social circles every now and then.

I HATE iPod. I love Zune and Zen. We can start an iPod Haters Anonymous.