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Post by TheLuckyOne on May 14, 2008 21:08:50 GMT -5
...There are exactly 4 glass bottles in the world. If you ever happen to acquire one, guard it with your life.
...It is perfectly acceptable to greet an old friend you haven't seen in years by hurling fireballs at him in an impromptu street brawl, as long as you're both wearing identical vests of different colors.
...The only useful guns are those that can fire in 5 directions at once.
Continue.
-D
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Post by TheOogieBoogieMan on May 14, 2008 21:22:17 GMT -5
...Grog is made from, among other things, pepperoni and axle grease. It can eat through a mug, so drink that refreshing brew quickly.
...No matter how violent and gruesome the crime you committed, your lawyer will get you back on the streets in about three seconds.
...If you smash bricks open with your head, you'll get money.
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Post by Head Mutant on May 15, 2008 15:40:36 GMT -5
...The entire world can be boiled down to Air, Water, Fire and Earth elements, with according weaknesses.
...You will never get out alive in the end (thanks Atari 2600 era!)
...Plumbing is a respectable, nay HEROIC, profession.
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Rett Mikhal
Ghostbuster
Shorten your stream, I don't want my face burned off!
Posts: 377
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Post by Rett Mikhal on May 15, 2008 16:01:53 GMT -5
No matter how beat up your vehicle is, it can easily be repaired, repeatedly, while on the go, or within a day.
All pilots can see underneath their planes and switch to an external view on the fly, even in WWI and WWII.
A tank cannon is a one-man portable weapon.
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Post by blinkfan on May 15, 2008 18:45:21 GMT -5
If you eat a really big round thing, you can devour ghosts.
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katoot
Mini-Mutant
Too Much Fun
Posts: 15
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Post by katoot on May 15, 2008 19:14:28 GMT -5
Hookers can heal you.
All the stars and planets are made up from everyday things and people on Earth, rolled up into a ball.
You can save the world, so long as you have a sword, and do not talk.
Up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, B, A: The key to happiness.
You can be a Rock Gawd, as long as you can play five notes.
You can rescue princesses by merely jumping over/on things.
Hedgehogs are damn fast and have stylish sneakers.
You can freeze time so you can take a bathroom break or grab a quick snack.
Anytime you acquire something new, it is mandatory that you hold it above your head for a few moments first, for all the world to see.
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Post by Head Mutant on May 15, 2008 19:59:50 GMT -5
...There are ALWAYS do-overs.
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eatmyshorts
Ghostbuster
"Do you like-a-da Fat Boys?"
Posts: 536
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Post by eatmyshorts on May 15, 2008 20:01:42 GMT -5
nothing.
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Post by StarOpal on May 15, 2008 21:42:11 GMT -5
Paper delivery is an incredibly hazardous profession.
Not only are people fine with you barging into their house, busting up their furniture, and stealing their belongings, they'll usually follow it up with random chit chat.
It's never bad sportsmanship to victory dance after beating someone.
Old men and small animals can always kick your ***.
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Post by Hucklebubba on May 15, 2008 21:49:08 GMT -5
Any injury, no matter how grievous, can be healed with a good night's sleep, or by stepping on a first aid kit.
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Post by TheLuckyOne on May 15, 2008 22:13:13 GMT -5
...Three strikes of your sword will kill nearly anything, but you can slice a chicken a hundred times and it'll just beat the $#&% out of you.
...People and small pets are great to eat, but toilets taste nasty.
...If you ever need a particular skill, just find someone else who can do it and kick their ass.
-D
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Post by TheOogieBoogieMan on May 15, 2008 22:20:55 GMT -5
...aim not at where the spaceships are, but at where they're going to be.
...your princess will always be in another castle. *sigh*
...ocarinas are the greatest musical instrument EVER.
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Post by StarOpal on May 16, 2008 8:39:23 GMT -5
You will always be in some way related (usually by one degree) to your enemy, by blood, childhood friend, war buddy, your dentist, something. Everyone but you will remember or know about this.
Contrary to popular belief, fighting tournaments, legal or otherwise, do not have divisions based on weight class, age, gender, species, or living/dead/undead status.
Even across a distance of ten yards, a sword is always a match for a gun. In fact it's usually better.
The people you're depending on to help you on your mission will often be incapable of simple tasks like going through a door, jumping, or getting out of enemy fire.
The song with lyrics means Twu Wuv.
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Post by Head Mutant on May 16, 2008 9:05:35 GMT -5
Everyone's greatest weakness will be exposed, be flashy, and cause them to explode when hit.
People in the world are condemned to standing in one place (or walking in a pattern), just waiting for you to talk to them so they can share the one nugget of info they possess.
There is no cake.
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Post by pfrsue on May 16, 2008 9:35:38 GMT -5
A complete lack of opposable thumbs will not in any way impede your ability to shoot guns or drive/pilot any number of vehicles.
A barbecue related mishap could result in an unsightly tombstone right next to the gas grill on your patio.
A pool with a diving board, but no ladders, is the perfect murder weapon.
It is entirely possible, and even advisable, to eat several whole lobsters during a battle.
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