Post by Hucklebubba on Jan 28, 2009 1:34:00 GMT -5
So the other day, I was thinking to myself, "You know, self, you're even less peppy nowadays than you already weren't, and it probably isn't because you're fifty pounds overweight, queen-ant sedentary, and you adhere to a horrible diet. And even if it were, none of that is going to change. But still, you need to do something."
"What do you want from me?" I replied, "I already adhere to a strict cardio/weight loss regimen consisting entirely of cinnamon rolls and sleep. Isn't that enough?"
"Afraid not" said I, "What you need, my friend, is something from Japan that sucks poison out through your feet."
And so it was, compelled by my own curiosity and the enthusiastic recommendation of a biker and his horse-faced girlfriend (here in Missouri, that's what passes for a credible source), that I snagged some Kinoki foot pads from the local Walgreens, and felt like a total hippie for it. I even had to explain to the cashier that I was just curious, and that I was going to go in convinced that it was a sham so as to avoid any placebo effect. Because I am apparently desperately concerned what cashiers think about me*.
For those of you who haven't seen the ads for the item in question, they're little patches you stick on your feet, and they contain herbs and dried powdered bunnies and whatnot, and there's a little pouch on them, and you wear them overnight and then wake up to find that your feet have taken a poo in them. Yay! It's like Christmas morning every day!
Anyway, I'm trying them tonight for the first time. Updates and impressions as they happen.
*This is the same day I bought close to $80 worth of SNES cartridges from the local Gamewerks, and while checking out mentioned to the modestly-attractive (as in, only a couple of leagues out of my league) clerk, "I collect... or I spend compulsively. Maybe a little of both."
Oh yeah; I may be too cool for this plane of existence. That was the ol' Kaleb one-two I demonstrated for you just now: Open with extreme nerdiness, then seal the deal with an admission of a possible personality disorder. The ladies will fall at your feet.
"What do you want from me?" I replied, "I already adhere to a strict cardio/weight loss regimen consisting entirely of cinnamon rolls and sleep. Isn't that enough?"
"Afraid not" said I, "What you need, my friend, is something from Japan that sucks poison out through your feet."
And so it was, compelled by my own curiosity and the enthusiastic recommendation of a biker and his horse-faced girlfriend (here in Missouri, that's what passes for a credible source), that I snagged some Kinoki foot pads from the local Walgreens, and felt like a total hippie for it. I even had to explain to the cashier that I was just curious, and that I was going to go in convinced that it was a sham so as to avoid any placebo effect. Because I am apparently desperately concerned what cashiers think about me*.
For those of you who haven't seen the ads for the item in question, they're little patches you stick on your feet, and they contain herbs and dried powdered bunnies and whatnot, and there's a little pouch on them, and you wear them overnight and then wake up to find that your feet have taken a poo in them. Yay! It's like Christmas morning every day!
Anyway, I'm trying them tonight for the first time. Updates and impressions as they happen.
*This is the same day I bought close to $80 worth of SNES cartridges from the local Gamewerks, and while checking out mentioned to the modestly-attractive (as in, only a couple of leagues out of my league) clerk, "I collect... or I spend compulsively. Maybe a little of both."
Oh yeah; I may be too cool for this plane of existence. That was the ol' Kaleb one-two I demonstrated for you just now: Open with extreme nerdiness, then seal the deal with an admission of a possible personality disorder. The ladies will fall at your feet.
"If I'm going to be desensitized into a mindless stock animal, I may as well do it with a cushy ergonomic seat and magnificent THX-certified sound. -Kevin Murphy
