Heather does The Cat Returns

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

He is Puss! In boots.

As of yesterday I'm facing a four-day long stretch where I will be husbandless and with only about 6 hours of scheduled work. 8, if you count the commute. What with all the excitement I had cleaning the house today I could barely tear myself away to go to the post office, but I managed. I was pretty happy when I found my package from Amazon in the mail. I got The Cat Returns, a movie recommended by a crazed anime fanchick at Suncoast. I barely made it out of there once I told her I was looking for Hayao Miyazaki stuff. She must have rambled on about his movies for nearly ten minutes. Kind of like I'm doing right now....

So this one was certainly different. I sat through it thinking "This is alright, but nowhere near as charming and breathtaking as Miyazaki's usual stuff." It wasn't until watching the Behind the Scenes feature that I found out why: Miyazaki didn't direct this one. In fact it seems the only thing he did was as executive producer. I just kind of assumed that he took his usual position as head animator and director and all that. Wrong! Because of Miyazaki's advancing age he decided to bring in some new blood on this one to have people to carry on the legacy of Studio Ghibli. Hiroyuki Mirota makes his directorial debut with The Cat Returns. It wasn't bad. It's just that, like Sue pointed out in her review, this one was more for the kiddies.

Haru is a typical Japanese girl who attends a typical Japanese school and leads a typical Japanese life. One day she saves a cat from becoming road pizza. Kitty turns out to be prince of the Cat Kingdom. This act threatens to change her life forever, as she is showered with catly gifts by the court attendants (all the neighborhood strays, apparently) and then told she is to marry the prince as a token of the king's thanks. Nothing says thank you quite like a forced marriage. To a member of a different species.

This just isn't what I thought it would be. I don't recommend it unless you have children or are a die hard Miyazaki fan like myself. I haven't gone through all the special features yet (as usual for Disney releases of Ghibli films it's a 2-discer). Instead you should check out Whisper of the Heart. It's connected to this movie, done by Miyazaki, and much more beautifully animated with a story more of the quality like I'm used to with Studio Ghibli.

The voice acting here was a huge surprise. Anne Hathaway and Cary Elwes as the lead characters was enough to make me break my usual habit of watching only the subtitled Japanese versions. I have an extreme hatred of Disney's habit of craptacular voice casting in these anime. I only had to watch a few seconds of the vapid, blue-eyed blond tween Disney stuck in for the voice of the main character in Whisper before I made the decision never to watch the English version. Ashley Tisdale as the voice of the lead character's best friend cemented my decision. Why can't Disney ruin another one of their own movies and leave the geniuses alone? [/rant]

Getting back to the review at hand, I have to say that I was also impressed with how good all the other voice actors were. Tim Curry was a delightful surprise as the Cat King. I always like to hear his voice work (even if he was channeling a pimptastic Barry White for this one).

Aside from the "meh" plot and a story that didn't really bring me in, I have one last beef with this one: How did it manage to be stranger than Spirited Away? That takes some work. I adore Spirited Away, but I'd be lying if I said I never entertained the thought that it might make more sense if I were trippin' on some mighty good acid.

Speaking of WTF moments (sorta), this movie is rife with them. Rolling Haru's friend (dead by encasement in Jell-O!) away to her wedding feast? The entire entertainment lineup at the wedding feast? Brr... And what was up with the knife thrower's assistant crying and running away in embarrassment at her bra accidentally getting hacked off? She's a cat! Besides, shouldn't she have had six of those things on, anyway? Camo-colored cats? Okay that was cool. I WANT one of those. And lastly, what exactly is underneath Baron's gloves? He's obviously all cat but his gloves make it look as if he has human hands.

Even so, the guy knew how to make an exit. Gotta give him that.

[Hucklebubba]

First off, before I am consumed completely by the Tangential side of the Force; Your review was absolutely fabulous, like an army of Jans (how do I even know about that show, and why would I want to remember it?)

This is the part where I'm sorely tempted to mention that, as previously noted, your writing style resembles my own, and therefore your reviews are probably always going to be awesome. But, I need to maintain my facade of false humility. So instead I'll just add that this review also did a fine job of performing the very function for which reviews were invented; that is, it influenced my opinion regarding the film in question. Changed it quite dramatically, as a matter of fact. Except that it's fundamentally the same as it was before I read the review.

How is this contradiction possible? I would explain, but I feel a ramblin' in my belly, so it'll have to wait until later.

I have an odd sort of relationship with Miyazaki's films, and with The Cat Returns in particular. I saw Princess Mononoke way back when, and it ended up being one of those odd instances where I was fully aware that I was quite possibly in the presence of the greatest thing that was or ever would be, but I somehow managed to not be particularly blown away, or made to want to seek out more of Miyazaki's work.

Shortly thereafter--and in a filmographically-anachronistic fashion, if I'm not mistaken--I watched My Neighbor Totoro at the urging of a friend, and found it to be enjoyable enough. This, due in large part to the fact that, under objective scrutiny, Totoro is one scary bastard. But, again, it didn't really make a dent.

If I had to theorize, I suppose it's just that Miyazaki's stuff is a trifle too pretty and weird for my blood. At present, the recommendation of his work--nay, the very mention of his name--will illicit from my gizzard an elongated "meehh*", which then reverberates down through the valley, rupturing eardrums and shattering windows as it goes.

And now for a jarring seque into why The Cat Returns holds special significance for me!

As previously mentioned, I am an anime fan. Add to that my fondness for one of the vacky archetypes found amongst anime's myriad mass of the same--the Catgirl**--and you can see how my stumbling upon The Cat Returns may have been inevitable.

However, it only took about two seconds of research to determine that I didn't need to waste a third. Yes, there was a girl, and yes, there were any number of cats, but no instance of the combination of both in the correct proportion (85/15, in favor of the girl; in case you were wondering).

"You played a trick on old Kaleb!" I roared angrily.

And so it was that a film I had never planned to watch, became a film that I planned not to watch.

Then along came your film review, and with it, plenty more reasons to walk the other way. Mainly aimed at the kiddies? Check. Filled with the sort of weirdness that just isn't quite my cuppa? Yessir.

But what really sealed the deal for me was the cat-bra. I read that part and was like, "Whoa! None for me, thanks."

So you see, what I said earlier is true. My present opinion regarding The Cat Returns is fundamentally the same as it was before, it's just that now it's covered in steel plating and automated minigun turrets.

So thanks BCWC! Now I know!


*Sounds a bit like a goat bleat, but louder and lower-pitched.

**Hey, I'm just in it for the endearing mannerisms and inexplicable cuteness of pointy ears. So don't anybody get any weird ideas. And I swear to someone vastly less-binding than God; if anybody says anything that even rhymes with "Furry", I will loudly make all manner of empty threats.

[bladestarr]

As much as people that I know go on and on about "Nausicaa", I always found Porco Rosso to be his most endearing work. Probably the sentimental in me that sees in myself a WWI fighter pilot magically changed into an anthropomorphic pig. I probably should see a therapist about that. Anyways, another good review BaccaWacca, and I think you're doing better on the balance of life and movie.

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

This is the part where I'm sorely tempted to mention that, as previously noted, your writing style resembles my own, and therefore your reviews are probably always going to be awesome.

Love the narcissism there!

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

it influenced my opinion regarding the film in question. Changed it quite dramatically, as a matter of fact. Except that it's fundamentally the same as it was before I read the review.

*Searches for a bottle of aspirin*

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

I saw Princess Mononoke way back when, and it ended up being one of those odd instances where I was fully aware that I was quite possibly in the presence of the greatest thing that was or ever would be, but I somehow managed to not be particularly blown away, or made to want to seek out more of Miyazaki's work.

I felt the same way about Princess Mononoke. It isn't one of my favorites, yet it's got something about it that I have to appreciate as important. I've watched it all the way through about twice. Only because the first time I watched it was on a VHS I got in a bargain bin in Japan, so it didn't have subtitles.

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

Shortly thereafter--and in a filmographically-anachronistic fashion, if I'm not mistaken--I watched My Neighbor Totoro at the urging of a friend, and found it to be enjoyable enough. This, due in large part to the fact that, under objective scrutiny, Totoro is one scary bastard. But, again, it didn't really make a dent.

This is one of many of his stuff I haven't seen. It doesn't appeal to me, but apparently the forces of the anime world compel me to watch it before I die.

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

If I had to theorize, I suppose it's just that Miyazaki's stuff is a trifle too pretty and weird for my blood. At present, the recommendation of his work--nay, the very mention of his name--will illicit from my gizzard an elongated "meehh*", which then reverberates down through the valley, rupturing eardrums and shattering windows as it goes.

I'd protect that idea. Miyazaki may stumble across here and use that for a character. Sounds right up his alley.

Jun 24, 2008 0:39:04 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

**Hey, I'm just in it for the endearing mannerisms and inexplicable cuteness of pointy ears. So don't anybody get any weird ideas. And I swear to someone vastly less-binding than God; if anybody says anything that even rhymes with "Furry", I will loudly make all manner of empty threats.

Okay. Yiff.

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

Jun 24, 2008 1:06:00 GMT -5 @bladestarr said:

As much as people that I know go on and on about "Nausicaa", I always found Porco Rosso to be his most endearing work. Probably the sentimental in me that sees in myself a WWI fighter pilot magically changed into an anthropomorphic pig. I probably should see a therapist about that. Anyways, another good review BaccaWacca, and I think you're doing better on the balance of life and movie.

Two more of his works I haven't seen! I'll go looking for those at the rental store today. I think I may actually do a whole string of Miyazaki reviews. I don't think I'd do Spirited Away though. It was done about 3 or 4 times on the MRFH site and I just don't see anything I can bring to the table on that one. You'd probably end up with another one of my personal life stories giving a passing mention of the film, ala The Incredible Hulk. I hadn't planned on reviewing that one. The idea just came to me afterward, so I had no notes or anything. These last two I watched at home and took plenty of notes during. that probably accounts for the much better MRFHy formula (Sorry, Sue.)

And yes, therapy could be good for someone like you. Yiff.

BaccaWacca....I love it.

[Hucklebubba]

Jun 24, 2008 10:47:30 GMT -5 BlackCatWhiteCat said:

Okay. Yiff.

Aargh! Confound your clever sidestepping of my previously-established threat condition!

[BlackCatWhiteCat]

Jun 25, 2008 1:21:19 GMT -5 Hucklebubba said:

Aargh! Confound your clever sidestepping of my previously-established threat condition!

*Does an annoying victory dance to this.*