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Post by Head Mutant on Apr 4, 2004 21:42:50 GMT -5
Guess this is a sort of feedback, even if I'm asking for it.
Just curious, out of all the quotes I pulled from CAP, which was your favorite? As for me, the phrase "hotdog heroics" will be with me to the day I die.
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Post by Hucklebubba on Apr 4, 2004 23:29:08 GMT -5
Sea Nibblers, all the way. I have no idea what they are, exactly, but I firmly believe they deserve joint mascot status with the penis fish. It'll be great. We can have an aquatic motif.
Seriously, when I read the line about Sea Nibblers, I had to bust a gut, possibly two. What the heck happened there? It's like the CAPAlert guy's butt-clenching legalism sprang a leak, and he went all silly for a second.
Also, the referenced scene from Castaway would certainly make for an odd forensics report: "We won't know anything for sure until the lab results come back, but it looks like he was nibbled on....by Sea Nibblers."
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Post by DocD83 on Apr 5, 2004 7:56:34 GMT -5
I enjoy anything where they include "punk dress" as a negative thing unto itself. I guess they never see nature shows either: "eating of animals by animals." And "adolescents in a forest with no adult protection" was pretty good too. Oh no! Pine needles! We fifteen year olds have no idea how to handle that! Adult! We need and adult!
But you missed my favorite one: under the wonton violence/crime category was listed "peril of fall from great height." (RotK, I think).
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Post by FiveMileSmile on Apr 5, 2004 8:21:51 GMT -5
The "eating of animals by other animals" is my favourite...
- Rich
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Uber
Boomstick Coordinator
Who Farted?
Posts: 293
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Post by Uber on Apr 5, 2004 8:56:22 GMT -5
It would have to be either "organized ghost inhabitation" (from The Others) or "massive tattoos" (from Honey).
Seriously, why do some people think tattoos are evil? I'll never get one because I'm deathly afraid of needles, but that's my choice. Sad sad misconceptions this world sometimes has.
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Post by Magill on Apr 5, 2004 10:55:06 GMT -5
I'm sure Justin will correct me, but I believe there's something in Leviticus against tattoos. Some people (my stepmother, included) think it's "mutilating the body God gave you."
I think my favorite was "putting children in control of things well beyond the capabilities of the age stratum". Some of the stuff they're just so far off base on. They compare a scene in Panic Room to the Holocaust? They don't get that people make the "devil horn" sign at rock concerts simply because they think they're cool (not as a Satanic ritual). It's just so bad.
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Post by DocD83 on Apr 5, 2004 11:39:17 GMT -5
I'm inclined to cut them some slack on the tattoo thing, because they are after all a site geared to assesing the suitability of movies for children. I don't think movies have as big an impact on our actions as these guys do, but then a tattoo is a bit different than blasting someone's brains out so I'll concede the point to them.
But no matter how you cut it tattooos aren't evil.
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DARTHMADLER
Boomstick Coordinator
WARNING: Low Overhang
Posts: 215
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Post by DARTHMADLER on Apr 5, 2004 12:18:13 GMT -5
Charlies Angels : "gamming"
I looked it up and am now wondering if this guy might not also be affiliated with GreenPeace. Or maybe he just hates the sea.
Gamming:
1. A social visit or friendly interchange, especially between whalers or seafarers.
2. A herd of whales or a social congregation of whalers, especially at sea.
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Post by Head Mutant on Apr 5, 2004 12:47:04 GMT -5
He's used gamming a lot, and defined it as showing off a girl's thigh... more specifically the back of it or something. Basically, flashing some leggage.
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Post by PoolMan on Apr 5, 2004 12:53:50 GMT -5
Jeez, J, I can't believe you went through all that. Thanks!
I guess what's really burning on my mind is... does CAP actually recommend ANYTHING? I mean, I saw ET, Veggietales, and Finding Nemo on that list... is there anything they think is okay for parents to show their kids, or should a parent just blind their kids as infants?
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Post by Head Mutant on Apr 5, 2004 13:03:59 GMT -5
It took a while. At first it was kind of fun, but it was annoying to read through the same stock complaints on various films while trying to pick out the unusual ones.
I don't think they "recommend" anything. They have a stoplight rating to go with their complex numbered ratings, and for most of the films it's flashing red (don't go), and once in a while yellow (don't go). I only saw one green for all of the films I looked at.
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Post by Lissa on Apr 5, 2004 13:24:09 GMT -5
Actually, they DID give a 100 (I think) to something: Mary Poppins. That's the movie that's gotten the highest review on their website. On the one hand, I can appreciate the massive details. While most parents would have a problem with "animals eating animals", what if I have a child who WOULD get nightmares from that? (Of course, usually it's a lot less bloody....) If there's something that really does bug your kid (or you), I guess it's sort of nice to be able to find someone who can list every concievable flaw ever in a film. Maybe.  But I do agree- the "animals eating animals" or however they phrased it was ridiculous! |
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Post by PoolMan on Apr 5, 2004 13:56:43 GMT -5
Mary Poppins?!?
Surely not. Look at these affronts to God in that movie:
- dining on the ceiling, a clear insult to the Lord's laws of gravity
- a flying housemaid... further disrepect to Old Man Gravity, plus children could emulate this, leaping off rooftops with umbrellas!
- sassing your elders
- substituting sugar for medicine? Blasphemy!
I'm going to boycott this movie RIGHT NOW!!!#nosmileys
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Post by DocD83 on Apr 5, 2004 14:09:53 GMT -5
Wasn't her umbrella handle carved like a parrot head and could talk? Idol worship and gaianism, I say!
You know, I just remembered something from a while back...I actually got an apolgy from these guys once, back when I first found their site. Can you believe that? I complained about them posting a review without seeing the whole movie.
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Post by dajaymann on Apr 5, 2004 14:34:28 GMT -5
The other night I was inspired (after reading Jusin's article - which is brilliant by the way) to see if I could think of a major hollywood film that just seems full of moral and merit, and then see what CAP says about it. So I decided to go with Forrest Gump (coincidentally, the wife and I watched it the other night) and thought to myself, "CAP couldn't possibly have a problem with the message of this film, right?" Oh, was I wrong!!! Here's how their review starts out:
"Forrest Gump was a prime example of attemps of Hollywood to lower the threshold of acceptance of immoral and vulgar material. Under the humorous and warm front was graphic violence, very foul language, sexual material, some use of drugs and alcohol, and a suicide attempt."
Granted, Forrest Gump does portray all of the things stated in the above, I'll give them that. However, I'm surprised that 1. the review did not take into account what effects these things have on the characters and story as a whole (i.e. - Jenny's drug dependancy and the effects of the war on Lt. Dan) and 2. the CAP fellow fails to express any disdain at what I thought were some of the more heinious things portrayed or alluded to in the film (i.e. - physical and hints of sexual abuse towards Jenny as a child, and nothing was mentioned about racism or the KKK [even though I thought that part with Forrest's Great Uncle was funny]).
I know I'm pretty much reiterating Justin's position in his article on how CAP ignores much of the positive that comes out of seemingly immoral acts on film, but I thought it would be fun to find seemingly innocuous movies, and then see what CAP has to say. I'm starting my hunt now!
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