Post by dex on Dec 11, 2009 10:22:29 GMT -5
But Dex!, you say, a review's a silly thing to write before release: I know you have not seen the movie yet. I know you've only seen a few trailers, half a dozen featurettes, twenty interviews and a hundred images.
You do not know, my friend – you presume. Falsely.
One trailer is all I've seen. That's enough. If Roger Ebert can review a movie he hasn't seen, then so can I.
What? I'm not exactly Roger Ebert? Indeed. The difference is, he copped out.
Up 200% in popularity this week. See why on IMDbPro.
Hmm ... no, thanks. I think I can figure out on my own why Avatar's currently popular. Now to figure out if one should pay money to see the movie.
What's in it for me? More than you could imagine. When I first saw the trailer, I was transported back many years: half of Avatar borrows from a short story which happens to be among the first one hundred pages of Science Fiction I've ever read. While 1957's Call Me Joe by Poul Anderson may seem quaint now, the awe it inspired during my personal Golden Age of SF still echoes today. You Transformer fans know the power of this kind of allure.
But, as anyone with a silly budget knows, one short story does not a movie make. So let's pile on the “War/Greed/Science = Evil and Tree Hugging Natives = Good” theme to hit two and a half hours of running time – or whichever eternity will end up on the Ultimate Collector's Blu-ray. Others claim Avatar also rips off FernGully: The Last Rainforest and Dances with Wolves. I wonder what the credits acknowledge. Alas, “More is better” does not even hold for ice cream. Why should it for plot points? On paper, Avatar has more moral deliberation than Sunday school; in effect, it falls far short of even the '57 story.
It's the basic “Rebirth” story line with a dash of “Voyage and Return”, subverted like in Shrek. To wit: our Hero, wheelchair-bound Marine veteran Jake (Sam Worthington) goes on one last mission, in return for which he shall be cured. On a far-away planet, he goes undercover for the military, who want to take a Space Oil deposit away from the savage indigenous aliens. Doc Grace (Sigourney Weaver, who doesn't get all that much to do) hooks up Jake's consciousness to an alien-looking, in vitro-grown body before Colonel Amphetamine (Stephen Lang) sends him in the field. Jake revels in his refound mobility as well as in being back on the team.
In the second act, he quickly falls both for the general and one specific (Neytiri/Zoe Saldaña) beauty of the land. Jake and we together realize the tree hugging locals deserve their peace, so he tries to influence the increasingly aggressive human campaign – to little avail. Finally it's time to put the cards on the table: After the last atrocity, he switches teams (and bodies) for good. Although the disclosure of Jake's identity shakes Neytiri's and her people's trust, they have little choice but to accept his help. Together with a handful of humans, like his pilot friend Trudy (a relatively mellow and cheerful, but still kick-ass Michelle Rodriguez), they prove that where there's a will and CGI, nothing is impossible.
In the third act, blood is shed with more concealment than restraint. Trudy dies heroically, so that the female audience – who has long forgotten to ponder if they fell for false advertising – can see the sunset-lit smooch between our two blue, sparkling sweethearts.
The nominally bountiful plot sounds more interesting than it actually is. Same goes for the soundtrack, which croons, “This is sooo epic! Trust me!” And CGI and 3D – while at least memorable – merely complete the stagecraft, which is that of a second-rate kickline. All those flashing lights, the pounding music ... gee, it's all so new and exciting! Overwhelmed by abundance and distracted by flash, you fail to focus on any specifics. The bag of tricks seems more than the sum of its parts, which therefore require no substance. The implication's enough.
The trailer's enough. Go watch it again, in HD. No doubt it's pretty. Then go read some SF.
“You are not in Kansas anymore. You are in Clichéville, ladies and gentleman.”
“This is why we're here, because this little gaudy film sells for a grand a centimeter.” (Yes, I calculated that. And kudos, Avatar, for going metric. Now that's SciFi!)
“They've sent us a message ... that they can sell whatever they want. Well we will send them a message. That this ... this is our lives!”
“You should not be here.”
“Just relax and let your mind go blank. That shouldn't be too hard for you.”
You do not know, my friend – you presume. Falsely.
One trailer is all I've seen. That's enough. If Roger Ebert can review a movie he hasn't seen, then so can I.
What? I'm not exactly Roger Ebert? Indeed. The difference is, he copped out.
Up 200% in popularity this week. See why on IMDbPro.
Hmm ... no, thanks. I think I can figure out on my own why Avatar's currently popular. Now to figure out if one should pay money to see the movie.
What's in it for me? More than you could imagine. When I first saw the trailer, I was transported back many years: half of Avatar borrows from a short story which happens to be among the first one hundred pages of Science Fiction I've ever read. While 1957's Call Me Joe by Poul Anderson may seem quaint now, the awe it inspired during my personal Golden Age of SF still echoes today. You Transformer fans know the power of this kind of allure.
But, as anyone with a silly budget knows, one short story does not a movie make. So let's pile on the “War/Greed/Science = Evil and Tree Hugging Natives = Good” theme to hit two and a half hours of running time – or whichever eternity will end up on the Ultimate Collector's Blu-ray. Others claim Avatar also rips off FernGully: The Last Rainforest and Dances with Wolves. I wonder what the credits acknowledge. Alas, “More is better” does not even hold for ice cream. Why should it for plot points? On paper, Avatar has more moral deliberation than Sunday school; in effect, it falls far short of even the '57 story.
It's the basic “Rebirth” story line with a dash of “Voyage and Return”, subverted like in Shrek. To wit: our Hero, wheelchair-bound Marine veteran Jake (Sam Worthington) goes on one last mission, in return for which he shall be cured. On a far-away planet, he goes undercover for the military, who want to take a Space Oil deposit away from the savage indigenous aliens. Doc Grace (Sigourney Weaver, who doesn't get all that much to do) hooks up Jake's consciousness to an alien-looking, in vitro-grown body before Colonel Amphetamine (Stephen Lang) sends him in the field. Jake revels in his refound mobility as well as in being back on the team.
In the second act, he quickly falls both for the general and one specific (Neytiri/Zoe Saldaña) beauty of the land. Jake and we together realize the tree hugging locals deserve their peace, so he tries to influence the increasingly aggressive human campaign – to little avail. Finally it's time to put the cards on the table: After the last atrocity, he switches teams (and bodies) for good. Although the disclosure of Jake's identity shakes Neytiri's and her people's trust, they have little choice but to accept his help. Together with a handful of humans, like his pilot friend Trudy (a relatively mellow and cheerful, but still kick-ass Michelle Rodriguez), they prove that where there's a will and CGI, nothing is impossible.
In the third act, blood is shed with more concealment than restraint. Trudy dies heroically, so that the female audience – who has long forgotten to ponder if they fell for false advertising – can see the sunset-lit smooch between our two blue, sparkling sweethearts.
The nominally bountiful plot sounds more interesting than it actually is. Same goes for the soundtrack, which croons, “This is sooo epic! Trust me!” And CGI and 3D – while at least memorable – merely complete the stagecraft, which is that of a second-rate kickline. All those flashing lights, the pounding music ... gee, it's all so new and exciting! Overwhelmed by abundance and distracted by flash, you fail to focus on any specifics. The bag of tricks seems more than the sum of its parts, which therefore require no substance. The implication's enough.
The trailer's enough. Go watch it again, in HD. No doubt it's pretty. Then go read some SF.
“You are not in Kansas anymore. You are in Clichéville, ladies and gentleman.”
“This is why we're here, because this little gaudy film sells for a grand a centimeter.” (Yes, I calculated that. And kudos, Avatar, for going metric. Now that's SciFi!)
“They've sent us a message ... that they can sell whatever they want. Well we will send them a message. That this ... this is our lives!”
“You should not be here.”
“Just relax and let your mind go blank. That shouldn't be too hard for you.”