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Post by StarOpal on Aug 13, 2009 8:46:54 GMT -5
85+ (Plus) dex!
I assure you the mortal was not so suspicious seeing as how they were more focused on the bottle (I wouldn't use the word "fondling"... oh wait yes I would) then on my fangs.
Or my vaguely Eastern European accent.
Or the cape.
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Post by StarOpal on Sept 18, 2009 15:50:25 GMT -5
Joss Whedon interview:
"Does becoming "The Emmy-winning Dr. Horrible" change things?
"Whedon: Well, the Emmy-winning Dr. Horrible was never on TV. If we were on TV, maybe we would've won an Oscar. If we're in theaters, we can win a Tony. It's very confusing. We don't understand."
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dex
Ghostbuster
So what colour is the sky in your world?
Posts: 343
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Post by dex on Sept 18, 2009 18:12:08 GMT -5
This is about a funny thing I didn't hear, but I couldn't find a thread with that title.
Earlier this week I was in a bakery downtown Elsewhere. I was completely lost in thought, but in no hurry. I was the only customer and the two ladies who worked there were engrossed in a conversation. I just stared at the bread for a while.
I woke up when one of the ladies turned to me and said, "Women, huh!" From her tone, I inferred the conversation really must have been on the saucy side. I just mumbled something about not having eavesdropped, and she grinned, "I don't believe you!" I have no clue what they'd been talking about.
But all week long, I've been wondering.
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Post by StarOpal on Sept 18, 2009 19:35:05 GMT -5
I'd like to think the previous sentence went something like:
"And I said 'I don't think it's exactly "Kosher" to do that with a penguin.'"
"Women, huh?"
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dex
Ghostbuster
So what colour is the sky in your world?
Posts: 343
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Post by dex on Sept 19, 2009 6:54:26 GMT -5
I'd like to think the previous sentence went something like: "And I said 'I don't think it's exactly "Kosher" to do that with a penguin.'" "Women, huh?" Arrr! Ye be knowin' of such confoundin' cabals, lass? Be tellin' the whole o' this lore, says I! Thar be a tankard o' grog fer ye, or the cat o' nine tails if ye be nay but tauntin' me! Wenches, arrr! Ahoy! Ye all be talkin' like a pirate today! |
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Post by TheLuckyOne on Oct 29, 2009 21:01:29 GMT -5
Overheard out of context at work today:
"I'd like to bring back the oral/anal skills."
(Contextually, this is completely innocent and non-perverted. I do not work in the adult industry.)
-D
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Post by TheLuckyOne on Jan 7, 2010 22:32:18 GMT -5
[During a discussion of Stephen King]
Lady Luck: I did like that one he did fairly recently, what was it called? "Driver 8"?
Me: ....I think that was "From A Buick 8." "Driver 8" is an REM song.
-D
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Post by BlackCatWhiteCat on Mar 31, 2010 23:23:06 GMT -5
I have a couple between Ritchie and myself that happened tonight.
We're trying to wean ourselves away from "That's what she said" jokes, but sometimes it's just too good:
Ritchie (admiring his ribbons as he gets everything in check for uniform inspection tomorrow): "This is a nice little rack of chest candy I've got going on here". Me (once I was able to keep a straight face): "That's what she said".
A couple of hours later:
Interesting conversation Number 2: To set the scene, Ritchie has been diligently getting his uniform together, currently in the process of ironing said uniform after I spent a couple of hours sewing a patch on it for him:
Me: Woot! It's now 12:01 Eastern time. Payday! Oh and it's April 1st. April Fool's Day!
Ritchie: "Haha. Yeah. Happy April Fool's day, suckers, you've got a uniform inspe..........OH."
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Post by BlackCatWhiteCat on Aug 1, 2010 15:05:18 GMT -5
Yesterday, after doing some hiking, my family and I were sitting at a picnic table by the steep road that heads up Mount Laguna.
Just then a cop pulled his car over beside the table, leaned out and asked, a bit sheepishly "Have you guys seen any kids skateboarding down the mountain"?
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Post by TheLuckyOne on Aug 13, 2010 19:48:23 GMT -5
Lady Luck is attempting to install a towel bar in the bathroom:
LL: I just need a little screw. [half-second pause] DON'T say it.
-D
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Post by TheLuckyOne on Sept 19, 2010 21:39:43 GMT -5
So my in-laws came over yesterday. While to some people this would be cause for concern, my in-laws are genuinely great and we love having them over. This particular visit, they brought boxes full of old toys. My mother-in-law used to teach young children, I think kindergarteners, so she has lots of old supplies that she's now passing on to us for Baby Luck and second kid. I go to the back of their SUV, grab a box, take a step toward the house... do a double take, and look back inside the trunk at the box labeled, exactly as written, "ASS WOOD BLOCKS". i ask my father-in-law if there's something I should know; he looks, chuckles and tells me I'll have to ask his wife. So we bring the box inside, I set it down and turn to my mother-in-law and say, "Do you mind my asking what that first word means?" She looks at me blankly and replies, "'Assorted.' Why?"
Oh, to be that innocent. So if anyone needs blocks made of rare wood taken from the fabled ass tree, we've got you covered.
-D
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Post by StarOpal on Dec 29, 2010 23:50:30 GMT -5
From my favorite manager at work:
"You know how I deal with all this, Eunice?"
"How?"
"I take lots of crack before I come in. And by 'crack' I mean butt crack, none of that imitation stuff."
*on phone talking about one of the doctors*
"I form belly button lint faster."
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"If I'm going to be desensitized into a mindless stock animal, I may as well do it with a cushy ergonomic seat and magnificent THX-certified sound. -Kevin Murphy